Do you know the definition of emotional interdependence Dependence On A Partner ? Have you ever wondered what interdependence looks like in practice?
There is often confusion about the topic of interdependence. Additionally, we usually talk about emotional dependence, de facto referring to the mechanisms of interdependence.
Initially, it was thought that the development of interdependence only occurred when someone grew up in a home where there was an alcohol addiction. However, research YourLatinMates by Julie Fuller and Rebecca Warner of the University of New Hampshire found that interdependence can develop in any family with high levels of stress.
Emotional dependence on the other person in a relationship – what does it mean?
Codependency itself is not a mental dysfunction / disease. It can occur alongside problems such as eating disorders including anorexia and bulimia, it can also develop without the presence of addiction / dysfunction of any other form.
Interdependence is defined as prioritizing the needs, expectations or problems of others over one’s own problems, needs, or even one’s own mental and physical health. In interdependence, a person’s self-esteem comes from others. Codependents do not believe in their innate value, so they need external means to prove that they are important, valued, or loved (for more on building self-esteem based on our inner self, see the article on Low Self-Esteem in a Relationship ).
Emotional addiction / interdependence with the partner – symptoms
Wondering if you have the qualities of a codependent person? Being actively interdependent is very exhausting and is one of the biggest blockades of intimacy. The good news is that even if you discover that you are an interdependent person, you can take a job to heal these mechanisms in your life. The first step to change is to raise awareness, so check if any of the behaviors below apply to you.
-
Problems in communication
They are especially about talking openly about your feelings and emotions, and you may not have a problem with it when it comes to the feelings of others / your partner. One of the main reasons for not talking about your feelings is fear of rejection or being perceived as a problematic person.
-
Ignoring yourself
It is about prioritizing the needs of others over your own by frequently saying “yes” when you really want to say “no.” Satisfying others, on a deeper level, is looking for confirmation of your worth, importance or deserving love.
-
Being an “automatic fixer”
This feature is that when someone tells you about a problem, you immediately, even without asking for help, start proposing solutions. In this option, you can also try to YourLatinMates.com fix situations that do not concern you.
-
No boundaries
Interdependence boundaries are often blurred, non-existent or constantly violated. Focusing on others makes it difficult to identify and maintain healthy boundaries. You may tend to blame others for how you feel and what is happening in your life, or you may take responsibility for how others feel.
-
Running away from facts – Dependence On A Partner
When someone behaves badly towards you, you try to justify his / her behavior by saying: He / She was stressed / tired; he didn’t mean it , etc. You may think – I’m just a good person. But it makes sense to distinguish between being a good person and denying your problems due to your inability to confront a person or situation.
-
Excessive dedication
It’s about helping others to the detriment of your physical, mental, spiritual, emotional and / or financial well-being. What you should pay attention to here is that in codependency, the motive for sacrifice is fear of rejection or the need for control because you may not feel confident. Helping others is not bad, but it is worth honestly telling yourself what your intention is!
Features of emotional dependence on a partner – Dependence On A Partner
Are you wondering if the topic is only about women or the helpless? Nothing could be more wrong, but the fact that you have such associations is the result of many myths that are constantly repeated. Here are a few of them:
Myth 1: Only women are interdependent.
Not. Everyone can be interdependent.
Myth 2: Codependency only occurs in relationships with addicts.
Not. While interdependence is often present in relationships where there are drugs, it is not the only type of relationship in which it can arise. It also occurs in relationships where there are no addictions.
Myth 3: Codependency only happens in romantic relationships .
Not. Codependency can occur in any type of relationship, whether we are thinking of family members, friends, coworkers, clients, or romantic partners.
Myth 4: You can live with interdependence.
Yes and no. Yes – physically, it is definitely not a disease. No – because functioning in this attitude leads to exhaustion, often bitterness, and a constant feeling of fear and dissatisfaction.
Myth 5: Everyone who helps others is interdependent.
Not! There is help with good intentions and one that is motivated by fear and leads to self-neglect.
Myth 6: Only weak people are interdependent.
Not. Codependency has nothing to do with being weak or strong, nor is it about being weak willed. Codependent people can often be successful and be very independent, professionally fulfilled.
Where does emotional dependence on a partner come from?
The roots of interdependence can be traced back to childhood, especially in homes where stress, unclear communication, and a lack of understanding of boundaries and a lack of acceptance of a variety of traits predominated.
However, it is not always only home experiences that have an influence on this. These types of mechanisms can be greatly exacerbate. When you are or have been in an aggressive. Relationship or in a relationship with a narcissist, even if your childhood was functional.
Codependency is not a gene that is inherit, it is behavioral and it is acquire. Even though you did not experience codependency as a child, you can develop these behaviors as an adult. Some researchers point out that certain trends can be acquired already in childhood, especially where the foundation for a stable self-esteem has not been built (more on self-esteem ).
Emotional Dependence on Another Person – Is There a Therapy?
Many people struggling with codependency feel immensely lost and often don’t know where to start making changes. Each case is individual and may require consultation with a specialist .
What is the healing process of emotional dependence on a partner?
Here are some tips to get you start:
- Taking care of yourself
When you start making changes, one of the most important things is to shift your attention to yourself. Learning to take care of yourself can be overwhelming at first, so start with the basics: sleep, nutrition, exercise, medical care, and deep breathing!
- Setting boundaries
Establishing healthy boundaries allows others to be present in your life, but protects you from harmful words, behaviors, and expectations. Caring for others is important, but with consideration for what works well for you. Healthy borders are a prerequisite for a sense of security.
- Open communication
Often in the case of interdependence, we deal with indirect communication and passive-aggressive behavior. In working on yourself, one of the most important elements of “recovery” is learning the principles of open communication. Conversation based on clearly Dependence On A Partner defined needs and desires combined. With open listening and negotiating solutions. That also take into account your perspective – this is one of the main tasks!
Summary – Dependence On A Partner
Hope this article help you understand the subject of interdependence. If you see such mechanisms in you, remember. That they are not assignee to you forever and you have the opportunity to introduce. Changes in yourself and then in the relationships that are most important to you at any time in your life.